No Neat Boxes

 

Claudia - Henrietta - Me

Mother’s Day is …

There are years I muscle through church and smile politely through the flowers, sermons, and shiny family stories. And then there are years where my heart simply says, “Nope, not today.”

That was today. And I just decided I wasn’t putting myself out there.

The emotions come too fast and are too layered: foster care, adoption, trauma, loss, gratitude, grief, love, anger, healing, brokenness, redemption… all sitting together in the same soul at the same time.

Sometimes self-care and maturity mean recognizing that and choosing not to place yourself in situations that feel emotionally overwhelming.

And I get it… for most people today is simply a day of celebration. And I do celebrate, just in a way that makes sense for me and my journey.

Motherhood is not always tidy.

Sometimes it looks like bedtime stories and handmade cards.  

Sometimes it looks like therapy appointments multiple times a week and wondering if your family will survive trauma that didn’t originate with you but absolutely impacts you.

Sometimes it looks like tremendous joy.  

Other times… survival.

And then my phone rang.

Austin was calling from Miami where he’s working. He sounded like he was either in a stairwell… or a public bathroom… or possibly both. He claimed he had just gotten out of the shower. Beaver started laughing at the mental image, and Austin joked:

“Well, it’s probably just how you would’ve seen me if you’d given birth to me anyway!”

Honestly? That ridiculous child made me laugh out loud.

And underneath the humor was something tender too: connection, belonging. Yup, not  everyone’s version of a Hallmark moment. Just our weird little family being… us.

Later I called my mom to wish her a Happy Mother’s Day. My sister Claudia wished me a Happy Mother’s Day too, and then Mom did as well.

A little while later Claudia suddenly announced:

“I’m Henrietta’s mommy. You should wish ME a Happy Mother’s Day!”

Bless her heart. 😂

And honestly? She’s 100% correct. How did I miss that?!

That’s the thing about families. They come in all shapes, sizes, looks, and feels. All of it somehow exists together.

Maybe that’s what I’ve learned most about motherhood over the years…it rarely fits inside a neat little box.

It is joy and grief.  

Chaos and loyalty.  

Exhaustion, love, pain, and laughter.

And through it all, God remains faithful… even when the day itself feels messy and emotionally uneven.

Actually… especially then.

It’s been a good day!! And hey, what other day brings you the cordless glue gun you’ve been wanting and a beautiful butterfly bush?! 

I love you, pass it on. ❤️